St. George called. Bring them babies back!

I convinced myself and B that we should take the opportunity to travel to St. George, UT with my family to see my grandparents. There was much hesitation, mostly due to stress that accompanies any travel time with two 4 month old babies. But, my parents were willing to stop any time we needed and Parker and T were great help with feeding, changing, and holding.

(Gramps with Liam and Grandma looking at the tree with Finn.)

It was Grandpa Day's 80th birthday and we surprised them by coming down with the babes. They were excited to see us, but Liam and Finn were definitely the main event. I will never get over the joy of watching people love on my babies.

(Saturday morning. The Johnson family all together.)

So, how did the babies do? I can honestly say they did great for a majority of the trip! Poor baby Finn was a little constipated and couldn't poop the whole trip. Sleeping in a play pen was also a little weird, but they were smily and happy most of the time. Advice for traveling with twin babies? No matter how much you plan, make lists, and try to organize...just remember you WILL forget things. It is bound to happen. It WILL happen. Also, your babies run the show. You will strive as hard as you can to stick to the schedule you've worked so hard on for the past couple of months. Don't get discouraged if the schedule is thrown out the window, because chances are it takes a vacation while you do. But, you do your best. And your babies still remain happy and content...for at least 2 days. We aren't brave enough to venture any further at this time.

This is the last time P will see Grandma and Gramps for 2 years. He leaves for the MTC next week! 

Today? I'm grateful my babes are doing this. (side note: what is it about sleeping babies that is so angelic?) Anyway, B and I laid them on the bed while we packed up Sunday morning. When we went in to check on them, this is what we saw. Man, vacations are a lot of work. Especially when you're 4 months old. Grateful for a safe trip to St. George. Grateful for good weather. Grateful to spend time with extended family. Grateful to be home.

I've got the POWER!

(Baby Liam and Baby Finn)

Yesterday morning the babes and I were finishing up our morning routine when the light went out. I checked around the house and awoke my sleeping husband to announce "Brand, the power's out." After B checked the power box, walked the neighborhood, and called Rocky Mountain Power, we loaded ourselves in our car and headed to my parents' house.

When the power came back around 10:00 pm, we loaded everyone back in the car and headed home. On the way to our house, I kept thinking in my mind how inconvenient this whole day was for me and my fussy babies. Then, my mind filled with images from recent Superstorm Sandy and the many, MANY people without power still...weeks later. I felt embarrassed.

I snapped this picture this morning. Obviously, things returned to normal very quick. The babes slept through the night and are pretty happy today. I am grateful for a warm house with power, food, and lots of love. Life gets inconvenient. Be grateful anyway.

Family Night is a special night.

(Grandpa Johnson watching Liam and Uncle Shane holding Finn.)

When I was pregnant with the twins, we would go to dinner on Sundays at B's parents' house and I would joke how different things would be when the babes arrived. No surprise that I was correct. We still enjoy having Family Night at the Johnson's, even if one or two of us must postpone eating dinner to feed a baby, lessons are interrupted by crying, poopy diapers, or a smile or coo that must be recognized at that moment, and entertainment is pretty much just babies on the floor. Yeah, things are different. But, it's terribly wonderful.

I never thought I would find so much joy in watching people kiss, cuddle, and interact with my children. The minute we walk through the door at Grandma and Grandpa Johnson's house, there is no doubt these babies are loved to the moon. I watch my father-in-law's eyes light up as he welcomes each baby to his home. He makes sure to talk to each baby individually, which I love. My mother-in-law kisses my babies all night and it makes me so happy. I think one of the best parts of staying home with my kids all day is kissing their cheeks, feet, and hands anytime I want. It's glorious. I can't get enough of them. Neither can B's mama. If Shane isn't at the door right when we walk up the porch, he makes sure to be one of the first as we walk in the house. He is so good with the babies, it's amazing. (Ladies, listen up!) He loves to get down on the floor and play with them, even if just letting their little hands grab his fingers. I love it when he gets his camera out to catch a little smile or funny expression. My babies are so adored and it's fantastic.

Today, I'm grateful for in-laws. I'm grateful for unconditional love surrounding our little family. I love feeling like rockstars every time we leave their home. It's a good "refresher" as we start another crazy week.

You know that life we wanted? We're living it.

(Baby Finn with Brandon)

October is over and November has begun. It's the month we celebrate giving thanks for our bounties. Right now I am on the computer and my little babes are playing on the floor next to me. They are kicking their legs, smiling, and looking around. During these moments I remind myself that all the long days and nights are worth it. As the weeks pass by, I am continuing to learn the sacredness of the work I do. It's not glamorous. In fact, it can leave a lady feeling tired and frumpy. Fact: I don't think I've put on make-up since Sunday. Fact: My legs are hairy. Fact: The shirt I am currently wearing has a layer of spit up covering my shoulders. 

But this life I live...this life Brandon and I live? It's what we dreamed. I remember when we were first married, we would lay in bed and talk about our family. We would dream about our kids and what they would look like, act like, be like. I don't think we realized how much work those dreams would require or how much sleep or "Brandon & Megan Time" would have to be rationed. But, I also don't think we were prepared for the amount of love we would feel in our hearts or the happiness we would experience. 

That life we wanted? That life we dreamed about? We're living it. And I am incredibly grateful. 

One of those days, weeks, whatever...

Brandon walks in the door from work and asks how my day was. My response is unchanged from the previous day: "Long." I sigh to myself and B asks what's wrong. "I'm tired." I give him a grocery list and he heads to the store. I finish burping the baby I have in my arms and lay him in his carseat while I use the bathroom. I happen to catch a glimpse of myself in the mirror and groan out loud. I run my fingers under some water and try to wipe away the spit-up residue on my sleeve as I ask myself "Why even use a burp cloth?"

I spend a couple extra minutes on the toilet. Such a glamorous place to find a moment of quiet. When I come back out to the living room, I notice baby is awake and babbling. I start to talk to him when something familiar catches my eye. "You've got to be kidding me! Again?" Baby has blown poop right out the side of his pants. It's on his legs, tummy, socks, hands, blanket, and carseat. Angry that I had decided to give Pampers a second chance, I pick baby up and carry him to the changing table. I try to keep things as clean and untouched as possible, but I give up when he decides to pee right after I take the diaper off. "Aw, forget it!" I strip 'im down and put baby in the crib. This doesn't go over well and baby starts to cry. I get the disinfectant wipes and start to scrub the changing table. Baby cries harder. I go to give him his pacifier, when I realize I have poop on my hands. I run to the bathroom and scrub my hands. Baby cries even harder. I run back and put thepacifier in his mouth when I hear second baby start to cry from his swing. I close my eyes and give a little exasperated laugh to keep myself from bursting into tears. This is the second blowout in 2 days. The first time, it was like a celebratory event that deserved to be photographed and documented on video. I couldn't stop laughing and left baby on the changing table to run for my camera.


Funny how quickly things change, because any humor of the situation seemed lost to me this second time around. It wasn't hilarious. It was just more work. 10, 15, 20 minutes spent cleaning poop, instead of doing...anything else!

The next morning made no promises for a better day after second baby pees all over me, the floor, wall, and himself while I'm changing his poopy diaper. WHY AM I NOT GETTING BETTER AT THIS????? I strip both of us down and jump in the shower. Two birds with one stone, so don't judge. Of course, I put more sweats on and my hair in a pony tail because anything else uses too much energy. I feel guilty about this when B gets home, because I want him to remember the young, vivacious woman he married.  Unfortunately, she is just too tired. I go to bed making a mental list of all the things I "must" get done tomorrow.  Clean out the containers of molding food in the fridge, Google "how to remove baby urine stains from carpet",  sweep up powder formula from kitchen floor, move wet laundry currently sitting in the washer to the dryer, do dishes in at least one side of the sink....and...and...I'm out like a light.

I wake up at 1:30 am to a crying baby. I go into the nursery and put his pacifier back in his mouth. He smiles up at me.  I respond with "There is nothing funny about this moment.  You are seriously killing me kid." I lay back down. He cries again. I give him his pacifier. He smiles. I lay back down...again. He cries...again. This time I ask B to go check on him. B whines in his sleep "I'm...just...too..tired..." I get up, give baby his pacifier and hold it for about 2 minutes. He finally calms down and I go back to bed. But, now I'm too awake and I can't go back to sleep for another hour. 5:45 am hits me in the face and I'm up again to go walking with my Pops. I vent. He listens. And I feel refreshed.

And that, my friends, is my week. How was yours?

A Blessing for My Babies

*****

*****

Dear Liam and Finn,

Yesterday you were blessed by your incredible father, with righteous men surrounding. He reminded you that you were born into a family that loves you very much. He blessed you to make good choices, serve faithfully in your responsibilities, and to have inspiration to do good in the world. He blessed each of you to be a righteous father and husband and to love your wife and children. He blessed you to be the best you can be. 

On your special day, family and close friends gathered to celebrate your birth and blessing. 
This is what they had to say:



(Thanks to Laura Thackeray for her filming abilities.)

Babes, I hope you always know how loved you are. Not just by your parents, but by so many. You have come into this world at a time when courage, hope, and faith are greatly needed. 
Be that force.

We love you Liam. I cannot get enough of your "chatter". Just today I laid you in the cradle while I worked on the computer. 2 minutes later, you were cooing and making all sorts of noises. When I turned to look at you, you were smiling to yourself. I pray you never lose your voice. I think it will be one of your great gifts. You are strong, I can already tell. You had a rough start at the beginning and your mama and daddy worried about you a lot. But, we soon realized that when we let you do things in your own time, you arrive at your goal strong and healthy. 

Finn, we love you. Grandma Shaw constantly comments that you have a naturally pleasant nature. That's why she worries so much when you are unhappy. You have the biggest smile and it catches us off guard when we look down at your face. It's like we forget everything else, because it makes us so happy to see that huge grin and those beautiful blue eyes. I have heard you laugh twice and it melted my heart. We know that big noggin is difficult to manage, but we keep reminding you it's holding a big brain. I pray you never lose your positivity. The world needs more of it.

My boys, I am madly in love with your tiny faces. I can't help smooching them every time I pick you up from your crib, the changing table, your carseat, swing, or basically anywhere else. You watch me so closely these days. We have become little buddies and I honestly, sincerely feel you are two of my best friends. 

Loving you more than ever,

Momma

"I love you more than I am tired."

Friday night, B's parents offered to watch the twins while we attended the BYU vs. USU football game at LaVell Edwards Stadium. B even ordered a new Aggie shirt for the occasion...it was that big of deal! We didn't lay our heads down to bed until after 2:00 am. We were absolutely exhausted. But, as we turned the lights out and closed our eyes, I heard my husband whisper in my ear "I love you more than I am tired." Knowing we would be up again anywhere from 30 minutes to 2 hours later to feed hungry babies and that the word tired wouldn't even come close to describing how we felt, my heart wanted to explode with love for this man laying next to me. How did I end up here? How did my story become so joyful?

Don't get me wrong, we are TIRED. I mean, I thought I knew what this meant before babies, but the last couple months have brought that word into a whole new light. Just when I think I can't be any more exhausted than I already am...I become more exhausted than I already was. But, amazingly enough, we keep going. 14+ diaper changes a day? Pfff. Piece of cake. Over 10 1/2 hours daily of just feeding? C'mon, give us something hard. Non-stop laundry and dishes, only 5-6 hours of sleep a night (depending on if I decide to get up to go early-morning walking with my father), and an endless amount of spit-up? Yep, this is the LIFE.

But, really, we are happy. Really happy. Because every day we get to look into Finn's bright, brilliant blue eyes and listen to Liam snort and coo. Some of my sweetest moments are changing diapers and looking down to find a baby boy smiling up at me. It's my favorite. ABSOLUTE favorite. I get so giddy when I see my babies follow my movements, whether that's getting up to fix a bottle or throw a diaper in the pail and their little heads move to make sure I'm still there.

Liam and Finn are receiving a blessing on Sunday from their father. I get emotional when I think about these sweet babies being held by this strong priesthood holder who loves them so much. He is the patriarch of our home, our provider, and my best friend. I hope our children (current and future) never forget the sacrifice he has made and the sacrifices he continues to make on their behalf. He LOVES his family. They are his greatest joy and he does so much to make sure they are safe, comfortable, and taken care of. I hope our children never doubt that their dad loves their mama. He always has and he always will. He honors me as a wife, a mother, and a woman. Even if things get hectic, people get frustrated, and life is upside down, I could not imagine a more joyful relationship than the one that exists between Brandon and I.

When kids are thrown into the picture, sometimes "passionate romancing" is placed on hold for a minute so babies can be burped and bathed. Greater effort is required to make sure your hunk of burnin' love stays burnin' when you smell like baby throw-up, your hair looks like a bird's nest, and you can't even keep your eyes open long enough to say "Good Night." But I don't think anything could have been more romantic at that moment, at 2 o'clock in the morning, than for a dad of newborn twins to profess to his weary wife that his love for her exceeded the deep, heavy exhaustion that plagued his very bones.

To quote The Office's Pam Halpert: "I didn't even look cute. That's how I knew he meant it."